May 21st, 2015
The chocolate covered "Chocodiles Twinkies" are not good. The texture is off. That is all.
May 20th, 2015
Tonight was the Younger Boy's last band concert. Not because he's graduating, that would be the Older Boy, and that was last night. He just doesn't want to play in the school band next year. This means we won't have to rent band instruments next year, so there's that.
It was a good show, and I planned on staying for the whole thing, not just my kid's class. Only I didn't feel so good. I left work early, but not early enough to come home and eat before I headed back out. There was a Clif bar in the car, but that wasn't enough. I was slightly sick, head-ache-y, hungry, and claustrophobic. I watched my kid play from the auditorium hall, not in a seat, then I left. Three toasted frozen waffles later and I feel better. Not all better, but a good way there.
It was Jazz Band, and they were tearing it up!
May 19th, 2015
In light of yesterday's cookie level, today's Softer World:
When the Older Boy was just old enough to be in charge of feeding the cat, we made him feed the cat. He was about as responsible as you'd expect from an eight year old boy. Regularly his mom would have to ask him "Did you feed the cat?" Or "Go feed the cat." and I'd have to chime in with "…to a bear!" The joke never got less funny.
Yesterday we, as a family, were a little more busy than usual. The Wife left a note on the kitchen table "Please feed the dogs". There was enough space under that for me to add "to a bear!" I still got it.
May 18th, 2015
There is such a thing as eating too many cookies. I have not hit that point yet, but I came close.
May 17th, 2015
We went to REI yesterday to buy the Wife hiking boots. We bought the Merrell Moabs that were on sale. ($69! From the usual $100)
Being a Big Sale week, they were pretty swamped, so we had some time to kill before the Shoe Guy could help us. (The Shoe Girl never had a chance.) What did we do? We measured the Wife's foot with a Brannock device. She's a 7 3/4 medium. That made her an 8, because for some reason shoes only come in 1/2 sizes. It's a weird system.
Her foot is a size 8, so we asked for an 8. The Shoe Guy said he'd go get one, but he also brought an 8 1/2 "because of the way these shoes run". You know how Merrell shoes run? There's a technical term for it: "true to size". People are so used to lying about their shoe size even when they are buying hiking boots they will stuff their foot into a smaller shoe! Where's the sense in that? But people being people, I'm not surprised.
She loves her new boots just from trying them on. They are the most comfortable boot she's ever gotten. That's not really a surprise, her last boot was a Vasque model, and they were built from a work-boot mentality, more concerned with protection than over-all comfort. The boots she had before that were cheap things just to wear out gardening and such. Before that nothing. She really didn't have much to compare to.
Do you know you can buy your own Brannock device? Yeah, used jobbies from Etsy, or brand-spanking new ones from the Brannock people. I don't know what anyone would want one, but they are out there. For home decoration I guess.
May 16th, 2015
Have you seen The Station Agent? It's an older movie, from 2003. Peter Dinklage plays a a man named Finn with dwarfism, and he nails it. You really believe his name is "Finn". Other characters say "Finn?", and he says "What?" It's really well done that way. Anyroad, people get on Finn's nerves so when he inherits a beat up New Jersey train depot he moves in to hermit. His hermitting is interrupted by other people, he makes friends, and lives happily ever after.
It's a slow thing, just meandering along, taking its time. No car chases, no gunfights, no song and dance numbers. There is a very exciting library scene (with screaming!), but I don't want to ruin it for you, but books are involved. Also, girls want to sleep with Finn.
You know Robert Altman movies, and how he just tells stories in his own time? Thomas McCarthy does this with The Station Agent. It's about the characters.
Also, Peter Dinklage has kind of a lumpy head. Other than that, with his expressive face, intelligent eyes, and the ability to wear the hell out of a suit, I can see what all the girls go for him. Lumpy head and all.
Also, Big Hero 6 was a good watch. It would pair up with The Incredibles as a kick-ass double feature. Too bad double features aren't a thing anymore.
May 15th, 2015
The Wife's boots blew out at a marching band competition we were spectating last fall, and now she wants a new pair. She doesn't hike, but sometimes it's nice to have some beefy shoes. It's good to have options.
Because this is my thing, I'm "helping" her. So I've been looking around. Looking around collects Internet cookies, which the Facebook uses to try to sell you stuff. Now every time I go to the Facebook they try to sell me new hiking boots.
I don't need new hiking boots, nor do I particularly want new hiking boots. Sometimes I forget this looking at the sweet boots in the slick ads. So far I am strong.
May 14th, 2015
Today I have to slice a banana with a steak knife because there's no kill like overkill. It was totally worth it to make a fried peanut butter an' nanner sammich for lunch.
May 13th, 2015
So, the Older Boy's Girl, she has a job now. At a drugstore. Her first night they had her stocking the condoms. She was a little mortified. (I'm sure they make the boys deal with the tampons their first day.)
All things considered I hope she gets used to the idea of condoms pretty quickly. Both she and the Boy are going to college in the fall, and well, things happen. Don't send a soldier into battle unless he's wearing a helmet!
May 12th, 2015
As a parent I am contractually obligated to say what an amazing adventure it is to have kids. Sometimes it really is. Like when you go to the school awards night and your own child is up on the podium being recognized. It also helps when they pronounce your name correctly. It's not a hard name to say, but there is a small trick to it.
It's when the other 942 kids are trooping along you wonder what you're doing in the gymnasium that late at night. I mean, it wasn't over until 8:30. 8:30!
May 11th, 2015
boots @ 08:41 pm
Yesterday the Wife and I went up to the outlet mall and browsed. She stopped in to the Merrell store (and what could I do but go with her?) and tried on a couple boots. She really liked them, then talked herself out of them. No boots were boughten.
Today I thought I'd browse through the Interwebs and see if I could find the boots, only cheaper. Nope. We did not pay any attention to the model name, so no good way to track them down. "Just go to the Merrell site and look at all the lady boots!" No, that does not work. Odds are they are discontinued and the only place to find them would be the outlet. REI, Campmor, Camp Saver, 6 pm, and Zappos were not a help.
Also, Merrell stopped making my Sawtooth boots. Good thing I got mine when I did.
May 10th, 2015
For the second and final time I've given up on Agents of SHIELD. I'm really enjoying Netflix's Daredevil. If the two programs switched media both would be better for it.
I tried to stay away from Daredevil, because I really had doubts on the concept. Really, it's Blind Batman: Year One, but that's OK. I am going to stay away from Ant-Man, the movie. I have no hope for that one.
Also, Scott Glenn was in an episode. (Maybe more, I'm not done yet.) At first I thought he was Lance Henriksen, but that confusion only lasted a few minutes. I'm not sure which actor is the meaner chunk of beef jerky, but they could be, like, brothers.
May 9th, 2015
Say two boys, aged 15 and 18, take their mother out for Mother's Day brunch. Somewhere reasonably nice. Then, the mother decides to have the traditional Mother's Day mimosa. The boys, being underage, have a root beer and a lemon-lime soda pop, respectively. The bill comes. The boys pay for it. Is this illegal?
The boys just bought an alcoholic beverage! My boys! I don't want them to go to jail!
But it turned out OK. They just got some sandwiches from Penn Station.
May 8th, 2015
"Pretty" is easy. It's just a mixture of "young", "fit", and "healthy". You don't even need all three ingredients, but your final score will be deducted. It's just the way it goes.
Now, "attractive", that takes some work. You need to build up qualities, and who has time for that? "Strength" (emotional more than physical, but you do what you want), "caring", "humor", "intelligence", "nice boobs", "kindness", there's a whole raft of check boxes you have to nail. So much work.
Or you can just give up an be a troll. Downside is you have to live under a bridge, maybe eat a goat now and again. Upside is you can bash people with your cudgel when the mood moves you. Cudgels are cool.
May 7th, 2015
You know you're old when you want to check the time and you look at your wrist. Because you have a watch there. Even though you own a cellular phone. Which also has a clock function. But, phone, not watch.